Epizeuxis: The Steve Ballmer Clippers Toilet Variations

Epizeuxis: The Steve Ballmer Clippers Toilet Variations

By T. Kent Jones


“The thing I hate most in life is arenas where you have to wait in line for the bathroom. I’ve become a real obsessive about toilets. Toilets, toilets, toilets.” — Steve Ballmer on breaking ground for the new basketball arena for the Los Angeles Clippers.


“Never give in, toilets, toilets, toilets, toilets!” — Winston Churchill 

“Toilets, toilets, toilets! I say let your toilets be as two or three, and not a hundred or a thousand” — Henry David Thoreau, Walden

“Toilets, and toilets, and toilets. Creeps in this petty pace from day-to-day. To the last syllable of recorded time.” — William Shakespeare, Macbeth

“Toilets, toilets, toilets/I got love in my tummy/And I feel like a-lovin you” — Ohio Express 

“This is a toilets, toilets, toilets world/but it wouldn’t be nothing without a toilet or a toilet.” — James Brown 

“Toilets, Toilets, Toilets/how do you like it?/how do you like it?” — Andrea True Connection

“We are toilets, toilets, toilets, toilets, getting back together” — Taylor Swift 

“Phil Spector tamps his frontal lobes and closes his eyes and holds his breath. And long as he holds his breath, it will not rain, there will be no raindrops, no schizoid water wobbling, sideways, straight back, it be a toilet, toilet, toilet, toilet, toilet, toilet, toilet, toilet world…” — Tom Wolfe, The Kandy-Kolored, Tangerine Flake Streamline Baby

 “There’s little in taking or giving/There’s little in water or wine/Toilets, Toilets, Toilets/ Was never a project of mine” - Dorothy Parker, Coda 

“The toilets, the toilets…” — Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness 

“To everything (toilet, toilet, toilet)/There is a season (toilet, toilet, toilet)/ And a time to every purpose under heaven.” — Ecclesiastes 3:1

“Toilets!”, the Byrds
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