Yahoo Sports has listed every player in the NFL as “Questionable” on its Fantasy Football Application ahead of tonight’s kickoff to the 2022 season, End of the Bench has learned.
The company released a statement Thursday morning on the new update after rumors surfaced earlier this week that the popular fantasy sports app would be assigning the single most infuriating injury designation to every draftable player on its platform, including every Defense/Special Teams unit.
“We’ve unfortunately had to cut back on our software staff, and thus have made the decision to go ahead and just label every player as ‘Questionable’ for the entire 2022 NFL season,” the statement reads. “By doing so, we cover ourselves when every player inevitably becomes a little banged up and we free up the necessary manpower needed to provide more streamlined sponsored betting content to our core user base.”
The company wasted no time in implementing its latest software patch, which immediately sent a flurry of pop-up fantasy notifications to cellphones across the country.
“It was like my entire team got hit by a bus or something on the way to the game,” Edward Keystone, an avid Browns fan and fantasy football enthusiast said. “I had to go to the hospital after checking them all because I was having so much chest pain. My heart simply could not handle another team being toast before the season even begins.”
When asked via email whether the company had any plans to change its decision prior to tonight’s kickoff between the Los Angeles Rams and the Buffalo Bills, a company spokesperson replied, “Doubtful.”
End of the Bench will have more as this story develops.